Predicament- Help!!

by Linda004 06/08/16, 04:06 pm

My daughter is debating on whether to continue playing school soccer or not. She's not sure if she will make Varsity and the JV team isn't good. She is playing club soccer and doesn't know if she should do both or just club. Any advice??

by Guest 06/08/16, 05:30 pm

Where's the predicament here?

You let her make a choice and tell her she lives with that choice one way or the other. If she chooses to try out and only makes JV, she doesn't quit just because the soccer sucks. If the coach is abusive or her grades suffer, different story, but otherwise, she sticks it out for the year.

If she chooses not to try and out, and then sees her friends having a blast, oh well, life lesson learned. She can always play school ball the next year.

Seriously, this isn't a life altering decision either way. Let her learn about making choices and dealing with the outcome of that choice.

Have some confidence in your parenting skills. You'll need them when faced with a real predicament.

by soccerjack 06/08/16, 05:46 pm

bwgophers wrote:Where's the predicament here?

You let her make a choice and tell her she lives with that choice one way or the other. If she chooses to try out and only makes JV, she doesn't quit just because the soccer sucks. If the coach is abusive or her grades suffer, different story, but otherwise, she sticks it out for the year.

If she chooses not to try and out, and then sees her friends having a blast, oh well, life lesson learned. She can always play school ball the next year.

Seriously, this isn't a life altering decision either way. Let her learn about making choices and dealing with the outcome of that choice.

Have some confidence in your parenting skills. You'll need them when faced with a real predicament.

This could be life changing...if the wrong decision is made...think it thru. Much better to pay for club soccer if she can't make varsity.

by Wannabe 06/08/16, 05:52 pm

I'm not seeing the conflict unless one of the coaches is giving out ultimatums. If that's the issue then it's a much bigger discussion that really depends on your DD's level of play, commitment and life goals (not just soccer goals). Remember for most kids this is only a game that will end when they graduate high school.

Play both because the seasons have very little overlap and high school offers some different life/leadership skills that some kids miss in club. High school is about playing for the school and building a network of friends on the team & classroom.

by Guest 06/08/16, 06:06 pm

soccerjack wrote:
bwgophers wrote:Where's the predicament here?

You let her make a choice and tell her she lives with that choice one way or the other. If she chooses to try out and only makes JV, she doesn't quit just because the soccer sucks. If the coach is abusive or her grades suffer, different story, but otherwise, she sticks it out for the year.

If she chooses not to try and out, and then sees her friends having a blast, oh well, life lesson learned. She can always play school ball the next year.

Seriously, this isn't a life altering decision either way. Let her learn about making choices and dealing with the outcome of that choice.

Have some confidence in your parenting skills. You'll need them when faced with a real predicament.

This could be life changing...if the wrong decision is made...think it thru. Much better to pay for club soccer if she can't make varsity.

How so? OP said the choice isn't club OR school ball, the choice is only whether or not to play school ball in addition to club.

...and even if it was, then both you and the OP have a much different perspective on what is truly an important life decision than I do...

by soccerjack 06/08/16, 08:33 pm

bwgophers wrote:
soccerjack wrote:
bwgophers wrote:Where's the predicament here?

You let her make a choice and tell her she lives with that choice one way or the other. If she chooses to try out and only makes JV, she doesn't quit just because the soccer sucks. If the coach is abusive or her grades suffer, different story, but otherwise, she sticks it out for the year.

If she chooses not to try and out, and then sees her friends having a blast, oh well, life lesson learned. She can always play school ball the next year.

Seriously, this isn't a life altering decision either way. Let her learn about making choices and dealing with the outcome of that choice.

Have some confidence in your parenting skills. You'll need them when faced with a real predicament.

This could be life changing...if the wrong decision is made...think it thru. Much better to pay for club soccer if she can't make varsity.

How so? OP said the choice isn't club OR school ball, the choice is only whether or not to play school ball in addition to club.

...and even if it was, then both you and the OP have a much different perspective on what is truly an important life decision than I do...

I was being sarcastic....its just soccer. I think being involved with your school is a good thing. I agree with your response and the other posters. The dd is old enough to make the decision. Being involved in your school is also something in my opinion that should be prodded.

by soccerjack 06/08/16, 09:43 pm

bwgophers wrote:
soccerjack wrote:
bwgophers wrote:Where's the predicament here?

You let her make a choice and tell her she lives with that choice one way or the other. If she chooses to try out and only makes JV, she doesn't quit just because the soccer sucks. If the coach is abusive or her grades suffer, different story, but otherwise, she sticks it out for the year.

If she chooses not to try and out, and then sees her friends having a blast, oh well, life lesson learned. She can always play school ball the next year.

Seriously, this isn't a life altering decision either way. Let her learn about making choices and dealing with the outcome of that choice.

Have some confidence in your parenting skills. You'll need them when faced with a real predicament.

This could be life changing...if the wrong decision is made...think it thru. Much better to pay for club soccer if she can't make varsity.

How so? OP said the choice isn't club OR school ball, the choice is only whether or not to play school ball in addition to club.

...and even if it was, then both you and the OP have a much different perspective on what is truly an important life decision than I do...

by Linda004 06/08/16, 11:08 pm

I am wondering if her not going back to school soccer (10th grade) will go against her on paper i.e. on her resume - lack of commitment, etc. She will definitely get onto Varsity in 11th grade so am wondering if she should just stick it out for this year too. She's definitely playing club. Any constructive advice would really help. We are from Germany and haven't been through the system in the US. Thanks!

by Guest 07/08/16, 07:03 am

Linda004 wrote:I am wondering if her not going back to school soccer (10th grade) will go against her on paper i.e. on her resume - lack of commitment, etc. She will definitely get onto Varsity in 11th grade so am wondering if she should just stick it out for this year too. She's definitely playing club. Any constructive advice would really help. We are from Germany and haven't been through the system in the US. Thanks!

You are correct. By not playing this year, there is a risk that it will be held against her in her final 2 years.

You tell her that, and then you still let her make her decision and live with the outcome.

by Marvelousmar 07/08/16, 07:04 am

Linda004 wrote:My daughter is debating on whether to continue playing school soccer or not. She's not sure if she will make Varsity and the JV team isn't good. She is playing club soccer and doesn't know if she should do both or just club. Any advice??

Willkommen in den Vereinigten Staaten. Möge dein Fußball Spaß machen.

Here is a thought. Pretty much Echo's bwgophers. Considering that she won't really know if she will make the Varsity team until she tries out and it seems she wants to play high school ball. She probably needs to try out to be part of their process. If the JV side is not that good maybe she could assist in making it better. Learn from the challenge and adjust her game as a result. This is not a life or death decision in soccer really it's a question of what she wants out of the game here. So many choices but that's just part of growing up. What is the job of a parent? I believe it's to guide them in their decision making process as they get older and become adults that can make good rational decisions based on facts presented before them.

So many things to consider and present them to her. Fact most high-school coaches will favour their JV commits the following year when making their Varsity team. ( If your kid is a super stud that will trump the history factor)

Does she want to play high-school ball. Some may argue at some schools that JV isn't high-school ball but it might be a necessary process for your daughter.

Does she enjoy the JV coach. If she enjoys the coach and thinks it can be add to her futbol then she should look to get something positive from the experience. Lot's more things to consider but have the conversation and at the end she is old enough to make a rational decision. Viel Glück

by 2_cents_worth 07/08/16, 09:40 am

Consider the talent level of her high school opponents. If there are a lot of club players on the JV and Varsity teams, then try out and enjoy the season with her friends. If the talent level of the teams is low, then stick with club only. As more and more club players decide to skip high school season, the teams fill up with inexperienced players. These players compensate for lack of skill with aggressive and dirty play. Now add in weather conditions, in the middle of winter, and playing on turf and you have a recipe for ACL, ankle, and concussion injuries. I guess the question for you is "how much could high school soccer cost?"

by dadof3 07/08/16, 05:44 pm

All good comments. My dd last year played her home position at school, but with slightly different responsibility...added an aspect to her game that she hadn't previously expressed. She learned to avoid injury by releasing the ball fast and collected 5 pks on fouls she drew/couldn't avoid. The play was bogged down and the competition was not strong...however, called up to varsity late and put herself in position to start this year with her work. Being a JV hero sucked, but if it was cold...we left early-lol. She was behind 2 senior 4-yr, varsity starters that both went D1...so no matter what she did, she wasn't getting a spot. Just dealt with it and moved on. Every year is a ONE year commitment. She is going to play this year, many are not. I just go and watch. Just dad for the short time she is still at home. Whatever she chooses, I support. Resigned to sitting in icy bleachers for many years (dadof3)...buy a badass coat and bundle up with the other parents...if that is what she chooses. Her resume will take care of itself. Stay warm and dry on Tuesdays and Fridays if not, and be thankful for that!

by textigerfan 08/08/16, 08:43 am

No doubt, high school soccer definitely can be the worst spectator sport weather-wise. Badass coat, gloves, head gear, footwear, etc., is necessary. Additionally, get a good sleeping bag as well. It works very good in addition to all of the gear you are wearing. Deflects the wind and the rain.

With regards to playing, if having fun than do it. If not, than don't. Pretty simple solution to me.

by Mia Hamster 08/08/16, 11:56 am

Encourage her to play for the HS team. My reasons:
'
1) LHGCL is shut down for the duration of the UIL HS season. Many club teams have no or very limited practice schedules as well. She will get bored.

2) The bulk of her club soccer friends will be playing HS. If she is competitive, she will hate seeing her friends on the field while she sits in the stands.

3) If she wants to play college, HS is another resume builder. Maybe the HS team stinks, but from a college coach perspective, it shows that she can maintain her grades as a student-athlete.

by nolanryan 11/08/16, 11:42 pm

Marvelous hit it on the money as did Mia. In addition to what they outline, with the High School spirit and pride being something that drives many kids, it may give her an opportunity to try something different. My DD plays offense on club. In HS, in her freshman year, she played defense, which had always been a weakness for her. She wound up having a lot of fun and part of a shut down defense for the JV team...and she still scored a few goals just for fun. What was great for her development is that she became good at another position so HS can offer things that we didn't know were there. But she and her club teammates that were on the HS team had a blast. Many times sophomores don't make Varsity because the Varsity players are very strong and there may be very little turnover. Our HS had mostly Juniors on Varisty last year and only 5 seniors. That isn't a reflection on the sophomore that might not make Varsity.

by tex_gator 12/08/16, 08:43 am

A lot of the girls on my DD's team made varsity last season (10th grade) but some didn't play much. Others requested to be moved to JV for playing time reasons. When it was time for the club season to ramp back up it was obvious (based on fitness and touch) what girls were playing a lot during the HS season.

by sleestack 12/08/16, 10:11 am

All good points above, and another angle...taking the soccer aspect, time commitment, etc. completely out of the equation...here is something to consider. My daughter started playing HS soccer as a freshman, and it gave her a group of friends that she is still really close to and does everything with two years laterl...now going into Jr. year. Some of the group she was friends with before HS soccer started, but she has made some new, lifelong friends as well. All girls will most likely find their way socially with friends in HS regardless of their interests/extracirricular activities, but because they start soccer practice the DAY school starts they have a built-in school family and are part of a group from the get-go. Additionally, being a part of the soccer team might also keep some kids out of other (somewhat undesirable) activities that exist in every school. Just another thing to consider in her decision.

by newbiefornow 12/08/16, 05:20 pm

Just to make the counter point and because it's Friday so Margarita's may be involved. Our DD played Middle school soccer and she was categorical about not playing in High School. The level at the High School she's going to isn't very good so all she'll really be doing is risking injury. She's doing Basketball and Track instead.

Consider a different Sport in High School just to mix things up.

Note: We're not there yet so it may not work out. Agree with the folks who said it won't matter except if your DD gets an injury that knocks her out of club soccer for several weeks. The downside risk of playing Varsity with Seniors when you aren't one.

Personally if she's ambivalent I'd ask her if she'd like to try something else in school. If she's good at Soccer she'll be good at other Sports.

by Seven 12/08/16, 06:14 pm

When it comes to high school soccer, I think the district must be considered . My DD played in a district packed with ECNL and LHGCL D1 players . The quality of play was good and the dirty play was not abundant . If she were in a district that did not have quality players I might be more concerned about her playing HS soccer. I know she has loved the first two seasons and is looking forward to January . I am not looking forward to the weather though. As for club coaches and them giving you a hard time........tell them to pound sand. If the kiddo likes playing for her school and you think she will not be getting beat on by hacks that can't play at a high level, go for it. High school soccer can be a lot of fun for her and for the parents.

by Sponsored content

Join Heath Soccer Academy (Rockwall area)	29/08/24, 10:58 pm	socroc
Join Heath Soccer Academy (Rockwall area)	29/08/24, 11:02 am	socroc
09/10 COMPETITIVE TEAM IN ROCKWALL AREA	17/08/24, 02:26 am	Jumpman
Last call Solar 09/10 Rockwall	22/07/24, 10:48 am	socroc
Last call Solar 09 Rockwall	22/07/24, 10:15 am	socroc
Solar 09 NPL NTX (Rockwall)	15/07/24, 08:15 pm	socroc
Solar 09 NPL NTX (Rockwall)	15/07/24, 06:35 pm	socroc
Solar 09 NPL NTX (Rockwall)	15/07/24, 05:18 pm	socroc
Solar 09 NPL NTX (Rockwall)	26/06/24, 10:29 am	socroc
2008G Dallas Texans Tryouts (Final 1-2 spots)	26/06/24, 10:20 am	Dallas Texans East
2008G Dallas Texans Tryouts	26/06/24, 09:52 am	Dallas Texans East
Solar 07 Spear DII Classic League	25/06/24, 01:42 pm	socroc
Solar 06B RL and DI Classic	25/06/24, 01:34 pm	socroc
RSC 11' GCL w/Coach Adam	23/06/24, 01:15 pm	acst
Oh Yeah! movin' on UP 09's	23/06/24, 09:58 am	acst
Open Practice	20/06/24, 10:00 am	Coach Jim
BvB '06 Gold D-1 Coach Chris Obara formerly with Ayses	17/06/24, 11:18 am	BiroBiro
Renegades 2016G and 2017G North Blanton	16/06/24, 06:30 pm	tareyncarol
FCP Dynamos 2010B - Looking For Players	16/06/24, 05:02 pm	fcpcoach
Solar 2014B Williams - White - Needing 2 more players	09/06/24, 02:39 pm	Marvelousmar
RSC ELITE CAC	09/06/24, 12:10 pm	acst
RSC 08Clark	02/06/24, 05:43 pm	acst
Sting 2011 Boys ECNL RL NTX	02/06/24, 06:17 am	Jumpman
NTX Celtic 2011B ECNL-RL-NTX Opportunity	01/06/24, 11:04 pm	FSFFL
NTX Celtic 06/07G ECNL-RL-NTX Opportunity	01/06/24, 10:49 pm	FSFFL

Predicament- Help!!

Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!

Re: Predicament- Help!!