Nightmare sports parents?

Flash23 wrote:Seems like NTX Soccer adults are acting role models all over the area. Fighting in the parking lot, condoning unsportsmanlike behavior and players illegally attacking each other on the field.
Sounds like a roller derby exhibition.

ballhead wrote:

rollstogether wrote:Or you can be the parent that justifies your player sucker punching an opponent player in the ribcage so hard that the player gets the wind knocked out of her leaving fist bruising pattern when the ball in NOT in play... Justification from the parent "Your kid deserved it because she was pushing. There is no pushing or use of elbows in soccer".

Yes, let's congratulate the player for exhibiting poor sportsmanship on the field and reinforce to her that assaulting another player on the field when the ball isn't even in play is absolutely acceptable because your team isn't winning.

And hats off to the Coach that hugged & apologized to the child because she got red carded and not once checking on the injured child or have your player apologize for this misconduct.

Kudos to their team manager who said " Girls will be girls".

Call me old-fashioned though. As a parent, it is my personal responsibility to have removed my player immediately from the field before the ref had a chance to pull the red card. Personally, I don't tolerate that from my dd nor from any of her teammates but I am just silly that way, hmmm.

Very disappointed with the adults in this situation as they are the ones responsible for molding this player's ideation of what is acceptable and not on/off the field.

But then again.... my player deserved it.

Yep, that will show 'em. You storming out on the pitch in the middle of the match to drag your dd off. Maybe a wee bit over the top?

rollstogether wrote:

ballhead wrote:

rollstogether wrote:Or you can be the parent that justifies your player sucker punching an opponent player in the ribcage so hard that the player gets the wind knocked out of her leaving fist bruising pattern when the ball in NOT in play... Justification from the parent "Your kid deserved it because she was pushing. There is no pushing or use of elbows in soccer".

Yes, let's congratulate the player for exhibiting poor sportsmanship on the field and reinforce to her that assaulting another player on the field when the ball isn't even in play is absolutely acceptable because your team isn't winning.

And hats off to the Coach that hugged & apologized to the child because she got red carded and not once checking on the injured child or have your player apologize for this misconduct.

Kudos to their team manager who said " Girls will be girls".

Call me old-fashioned though. As a parent, it is my personal responsibility to have removed my player immediately from the field before the ref had a chance to pull the red card. Personally, I don't tolerate that from my dd nor from any of her teammates but I am just silly that way, hmmm.

Very disappointed with the adults in this situation as they are the ones responsible for molding this player's ideation of what is acceptable and not on/off the field.

But then again.... my player deserved it.

Yep, that will show 'em. You storming out on the pitch in the middle of the match to drag your dd off. Maybe a wee bit over the top?

Didn't mean it as taken.... if my player pulled something like that, it has been my experience the coach benches the player for poor sportsmanship. As a parent, I want the coach to pull my player off the pitch if: pouting, poor play, or poor attitude. Player receives the stern "Coach" talk and is provided a moment to reflect on the bench which is awful with subsequent lesson learned.

Allow me to clarify..... Green team going to throw in the ball. Receiving green player awaiting. Red team player steps in front of green team player to get to the ball when it does gets thrown in. Green team player decides to push red team player in the mid back from behind with her elbow. Red team player pushes her arm back to gain space. Green team player punches red player so hard in her ribcage that it knocks the wind out of her. (A bruise in the shape of green team player's fist remains markedly present on day 2 with ongoing soft tissue pain).

Red team mom is obviously upset runs to the sideline to see if her player is ok because dd is on all fours grasping for air when Green team mother says " SHE DESERVED TO BE PUNCHED FOR THE ELBOW" without making any effort to check on the injured child or question the actions of her player. In this alarmed state followed by blaming the hurt child does not make for a reasonable situation.

Please define the parameters in which it is acceptable to physically assault another player especially when the ball is not actively in play on the field..... when the person receiving the punch has her back turned and cannot even defend herself.

We have all been there when a team is behind on the board and the game becomes increasingly physical. Crap happens when mixed with fatigue, heat, & competition then add a touch of emerging hormones.

Not calling anyone out. Not trying to stir any pots here. Not claiming that every action between both players during the course of the game was under microscope.... just evaluating the one moment in which another player was punched. In a forum such as this, I was hoping to gain some veteran advice and a reasonable conversation in regards to an accountability chain.

Collectively as parents, coaches, referees are we saying this kind of conduct is acceptable? If so, how do we establish a sliding scale to weigh the player's inability to regulate their emotions on the field with adequate discipline measures?

This is not a one sided inquiry just on the behalf of my dd but for the other players on her team. I adore them as my own. I seek a logic tree that I can follow to protect these children because if the professionals I entrust these precious athletes to cannot or will not protect them on the field then I need to find a quality solution to insure their safety. That is the bottom line.

OldSoccerMom wrote:

Flash23 wrote:Seems like NTX Soccer adults are acting role models all over the area. Fighting in the parking lot, condoning unsportsmanlike behavior and players illegally attacking each other on the field.
Sounds like a roller derby exhibition.

No. This is girls soccer. There are way more girl "punks" than in boys soccer, and the girls' parents are, generally, idiots. When the aformentioned manager said "girls will be girls", he was right. I'll add, girls parents will be girls parents, with regards to both the TFC '01 fight, and the parent above who is upset about what happened in the game. In the "real" world, one could say, if you don't like it, then do something about it. North Texas Girls Soccer is not the real world, so if you don't like it, tough s#!@.

rollstogether wrote:

ballhead wrote:

rollstogether wrote:Or you can be the parent that justifies your player sucker punching an opponent player in the ribcage so hard that the player gets the wind knocked out of her leaving fist bruising pattern when the ball in NOT in play... Justification from the parent "Your kid deserved it because she was pushing. There is no pushing or use of elbows in soccer".

Yes, let's congratulate the player for exhibiting poor sportsmanship on the field and reinforce to her that assaulting another player on the field when the ball isn't even in play is absolutely acceptable because your team isn't winning.

And hats off to the Coach that hugged & apologized to the child because she got red carded and not once checking on the injured child or have your player apologize for this misconduct.

Not sure what you are talking about with this one. The other team did not have a coach at any game. Only players were on their sideline. The team manager was on another field watching her younger child play. She came over from the other field - after the incident - when she heard the commotion and saw the sidelines getting out of control. She did go over and hug and try to comfort the ejected girl who was very upset and sobbing on the sidelines.

Kudos to their team manager who said " Girls will be girls".

Emotions may be clouding some perspective. Same person you referenced above as being the coach. Taken way out of context. Part of a conversation well after the game with a red parent who came over to her and apologized (kind of) for their behavior after the incident.

Call me old-fashioned though. As a parent, it is my personal responsibility to have removed my player immediately from the field before the ref had a chance to pull the red card. Personally, I don't tolerate that from my dd nor from any of her teammates but I am just silly that way, hmmm.

Personal responsibility doesn't only apply if your daughter is carded for her behavior.

Very disappointed with the adults in this situation as they are the ones responsible for molding this player's ideation of what is acceptable and not on/off the field.

But then again.... my player deserved it.

Yep, that will show 'em. You storming out on the pitch in the middle of the match to drag your dd off. Maybe a wee bit over the top?

Didn't mean it as taken.... if my player pulled something like that, it has been my experience the coach benches the player for poor sportsmanship. As a parent, I want the coach to pull my player off the pitch if: pouting, poor play, or poor attitude. Player receives the stern "Coach" talk and is provided a moment to reflect on the bench which is awful with subsequent lesson learned.

Allow me to clarify..... Green team going to throw in the ball. Receiving green player awaiting. Red team player steps in front of green team player to get to the ball when it does gets thrown in. Green team player decides to push red team player in the mid back from behind with her elbow. Red team player pushes her arm back to gain space. Green team player punches red player so hard in her ribcage that it knocks the wind out of her. (A bruise in the shape of green team player's fist remains markedly present on day 2 with ongoing soft tissue pain).

I imagine the bruise is similar to the multiple elbow sized bruises on the other girl's back. Both players involved were wrong in this incident. The red player was constantly hitting the green player in the back. After another uncalled elbow in the back, the green player spins around at hits the red girl back. This type of retaliation is not to be tolerated. And it wasn't. The girl was immediately ejected and her parents dealt with the situation afterwards.

Red team mom is obviously upset runs to the sideline to see if her player is ok because dd is on all fours grasping for air when Green team mother says " SHE DESERVED TO BE PUNCHED FOR THE ELBOW" without making any effort to check on the injured child or question the actions of her player. In this alarmed state followed by blaming the hurt child does not make for a reasonable situation.

The "quoted" statement is different from the "quote" in your earlier post so not sure what you actually heard. Regardless, something along those lines was said - after the girl had already been attended to - in response to the continuous verbal barrage from the red parents. Once again, poor judgment from both sides.

Please define the parameters in which it is acceptable to physically assault another player especially when the ball is not actively in play on the field..... when the person receiving the punch has her back turned and cannot even defend herself.

Hard to defend against elbows in the back as well. Both girls were wrong. Hopefully everyone involved will learn something from this experience.

We have all been there when a team is behind on the board and the game becomes increasingly physical. Crap happens when mixed with fatigue, heat, & competition then add a touch of emerging hormones.

Not calling anyone out. Not trying to stir any pots here. Not claiming that every action between both players during the course of the game was under microscope.... just evaluating the one moment in which another player was punched. In a forum such as this, I was hoping to gain some veteran advice and a reasonable conversation in regards to an accountability chain.

Collectively as parents, coaches, referees are we saying this kind of conduct is acceptable? If so, how do we establish a sliding scale to weigh the player's inability to regulate their emotions on the field with adequate discipline measures?

This is not a one sided inquiry just on the behalf of my dd but for the other players on her team. I adore them as my own. I seek a logic tree that I can follow to protect these children because if the professionals I entrust these precious athletes to cannot or will not protect them on the field then I need to find a quality solution to insure their safety. That is the bottom line.

ballhead wrote:

rollstogether wrote:

ballhead wrote:

rollstogether wrote:Or you can be the parent that justifies your player sucker punching an opponent player in the ribcage so hard that the player gets the wind knocked out of her leaving fist bruising pattern when the ball in NOT in play... Justification from the parent "Your kid deserved it because she was pushing. There is no pushing or use of elbows in soccer".

Yes, let's congratulate the player for exhibiting poor sportsmanship on the field and reinforce to her that assaulting another player on the field when the ball isn't even in play is absolutely acceptable because your team isn't winning.

And hats off to the Coach that hugged & apologized to the child because she got red carded and not once checking on the injured child or have your player apologize for this misconduct.

Kudos to their team manager who said " Girls will be girls".

Call me old-fashioned though. As a parent, it is my personal responsibility to have removed my player immediately from the field before the ref had a chance to pull the red card. Personally, I don't tolerate that from my dd nor from any of her teammates but I am just silly that way, hmmm.

Very disappointed with the adults in this situation as they are the ones responsible for molding this player's ideation of what is acceptable and not on/off the field.

But then again.... my player deserved it.

Yep, that will show 'em. You storming out on the pitch in the middle of the match to drag your dd off. Maybe a wee bit over the top?

Didn't mean it as taken.... if my player pulled something like that, it has been my experience the coach benches the player for poor sportsmanship. As a parent, I want the coach to pull my player off the pitch if: pouting, poor play, or poor attitude. Player receives the stern "Coach" talk and is provided a moment to reflect on the bench which is awful with subsequent lesson learned.

Allow me to clarify..... Green team going to throw in the ball. Receiving green player awaiting. Red team player steps in front of green team player to get to the ball when it does gets thrown in. Green team player decides to push red team player in the mid back from behind with her elbow. Red team player pushes her arm back to gain space. Green team player punches red player so hard in her ribcage that it knocks the wind out of her. (A bruise in the shape of green team player's fist remains markedly present on day 2 with ongoing soft tissue pain).

Red team mom is obviously upset runs to the sideline to see if her player is ok because dd is on all fours grasping for air when Green team mother says " SHE DESERVED TO BE PUNCHED FOR THE ELBOW" without making any effort to check on the injured child or question the actions of her player. In this alarmed state followed by blaming the hurt child does not make for a reasonable situation.

Please define the parameters in which it is acceptable to physically assault another player especially when the ball is not actively in play on the field..... when the person receiving the punch has her back turned and cannot even defend herself.

We have all been there when a team is behind on the board and the game becomes increasingly physical. Crap happens when mixed with fatigue, heat, & competition then add a touch of emerging hormones.

Not calling anyone out. Not trying to stir any pots here. Not claiming that every action between both players during the course of the game was under microscope.... just evaluating the one moment in which another player was punched. In a forum such as this, I was hoping to gain some veteran advice and a reasonable conversation in regards to an accountability chain.

Collectively as parents, coaches, referees are we saying this kind of conduct is acceptable? If so, how do we establish a sliding scale to weigh the player's inability to regulate their emotions on the field with adequate discipline measures?

This is not a one sided inquiry just on the behalf of my dd but for the other players on her team. I adore them as my own. I seek a logic tree that I can follow to protect these children because if the professionals I entrust these precious athletes to cannot or will not protect them on the field then I need to find a quality solution to insure their safety. That is the bottom line.

Don't know how to take it any other way, your statement was pretty unambiguous "As a parent, it is my personal responsibility to have removed my player immediately from the field before the ref had a chance to pull the red card."

Your post isn't really all that inviting to a discussion, "Please define the parameters in which it is acceptable to physically assault another player especially when the ball is not actively in play on the field..... when the person receiving the punch has her back turned and cannot even defend herself." My guess is there won't be many that will give you any acceptable parameters, because we all know there aren't any.

The truth of the matter is that you only control your own dd (and even then only to a certain extent). There will always be teams that play a physical style that borders (or even crosses the line) on violent play, clips, elbows, shoves from the back, etc. Not much you can do about that, other than to teach your dd how to react to it.

I think most teams try to play decent soccer, but it does seem like almost every division has a team that plays "that way", or has a player or two that have a barely controllable temper. My own dd has been slugged by another player. Fortunately, she didn't connect hard, but it wasn't for lack of trying. In my experience, eventually, either the system wears them out, or they mellow out.

As they get older, they seem to learn it doesn't get them what they want. Sometimes being overly violent actually takes them out of the play, then their own team is mad at them, and getting carded enough gets to them. Usually, I say, but not always.

You can always change teams to one that plays in a different league or division, but you'll probably run into another team that does the same thing.

LHD wrote:

rollstogether wrote:

ballhead wrote:

rollstogether wrote:Or you can be the parent that justifies your player sucker punching an opponent player in the ribcage so hard that the player gets the wind knocked out of her leaving fist bruising pattern when the ball in NOT in play... Justification from the parent "Your kid deserved it because she was pushing. There is no pushing or use of elbows in soccer".

Yes, let's congratulate the player for exhibiting poor sportsmanship on the field and reinforce to her that assaulting another player on the field when the ball isn't even in play is absolutely acceptable because your team isn't winning.

And hats off to the Coach that hugged & apologized to the child because she got red carded and not once checking on the injured child or have your player apologize for this misconduct.

Not sure what you are talking about with this one. The other team did not have a coach at any game. Only players were on their sideline. The team manager was on another field watching her younger child play. She came over from the other field - after the incident - when she heard the commotion and saw the sidelines getting out of control. She did go over and hug and try to comfort the ejected girl who was very upset and sobbing on the sidelines.

Kudos to their team manager who said " Girls will be girls".

Emotions may be clouding some perspective. Same person you referenced above as being the coach. Taken way out of context. Part of a conversation well after the game with a red parent who came over to her and apologized (kind of) for their behavior after the incident.

Call me old-fashioned though. As a parent, it is my personal responsibility to have removed my player immediately from the field before the ref had a chance to pull the red card. Personally, I don't tolerate that from my dd nor from any of her teammates but I am just silly that way, hmmm.

Personal responsibility doesn't only apply if your daughter is carded for her behavior.

Very disappointed with the adults in this situation as they are the ones responsible for molding this player's ideation of what is acceptable and not on/off the field.

But then again.... my player deserved it.

Yep, that will show 'em. You storming out on the pitch in the middle of the match to drag your dd off. Maybe a wee bit over the top?

Didn't mean it as taken.... if my player pulled something like that, it has been my experience the coach benches the player for poor sportsmanship. As a parent, I want the coach to pull my player off the pitch if: pouting, poor play, or poor attitude. Player receives the stern "Coach" talk and is provided a moment to reflect on the bench which is awful with subsequent lesson learned.

Allow me to clarify..... Green team going to throw in the ball. Receiving green player awaiting. Red team player steps in front of green team player to get to the ball when it does gets thrown in. Green team player decides to push red team player in the mid back from behind with her elbow. Red team player pushes her arm back to gain space. Green team player punches red player so hard in her ribcage that it knocks the wind out of her. (A bruise in the shape of green team player's fist remains markedly present on day 2 with ongoing soft tissue pain).

I imagine the bruise is similar to the multiple elbow sized bruises on the other girl's back. Both players involved were wrong in this incident. The red player was constantly hitting the green player in the back. After another uncalled elbow in the back, the green player spins around at hits the red girl back. This type of retaliation is not to be tolerated. And it wasn't. The girl was immediately ejected and her parents dealt with the situation afterwards.

Not in any disagreement that if you don't stand your ground on the field that you have to show some alpha behavior otherwise you will get eaten alive. The sequence of events that I saw: Red player gets in front of green player. Green player pushes her lateral right forearm into the mid thoracic region of red player's back. Followed by red player swinging her right arm into approximately 100 degrees of horizontal abduction with her elbow in 90 degrees of flexion and full forearm pronation to secure her space in front of the player. Green player then lateral bends to her right into a partial squat then closed fist punched red player while her right upper extremity is still in the air striking her right fist into her ribs 4-6. Soft tissue presence and subcutaneous fat differential between back and lateral rib cage is significantly different. Therefore, the amount of force to the posterior side from said elbow would require a significant amount of force and grandiose gross motor movements to cause soft tissue trauma as you describe. If you will PM me with pictures of the player's injuries, I will utilize as a visual tool to discipline my player. Furthermore, I will PM you the results of her radiographic studies tomorrow. This is an outstanding opportunity for all of us to learn how our actions negatively impact another persons well being. Thank you for being open to this exchange.

My dd is utilizing KT tape for rib pain as well as re-directing the lymph fluid to her axillary lymph nodes for swelling management which can be purchased at WalMart or Academy in the sports section not the band-aid area. It has instructions in the box or you can utilize their website for taping techniques if your player is in any discomfort. You can get it wet so it's great to provide support and manage pain while bathing or even when sweating away at practice. Plus it comes in awesome colors!

Red team mom is obviously upset runs to the sideline to see if her player is ok because dd is on all fours grasping for air when Green team mother says " SHE DESERVED TO BE PUNCHED FOR THE ELBOW" without making any effort to check on the injured child or question the actions of her player. In this alarmed state followed by blaming the hurt child does not make for a reasonable situation.

The "quoted" statement is different from the "quote" in your earlier post so not sure what you actually heard. Regardless, something along those lines was said - after the girl had already been attended to - in response to the continuous verbal barrage from the red parents. Once again, poor judgment from both sides.

The content remains the same irregardless of the sequence. Red player deserved being sucker punched because she was elbowing which was not called by the referee which in and of itself means nothing since many calls can be missed. Honestly, I can tell you that I only heard comments from the person in a melon colored shirt because she was continuously informing me that dd deserved the punch, no elbows or pushing is part of soccer and if her back was injured she shouldn't be on the field. My response to this was she was cleared for soccer play but not for boxing. Any other interactions I cannot account for because I made the decision that a representative from the tournament needed to be present because you are right the sideline was intense. In an effort, to prevent any physical altercations, this measure was implemented. Sounds like that was at least one good idea. If you wish to share with me any regulations that approve this type of soccer play, please I am open to all opportunities for learning.

Please define the parameters in which it is acceptable to physically assault another player especially when the ball is not actively in play on the field..... when the person receiving the punch has her back turned and cannot even defend herself.

Hard to defend against elbows in the back as well. Both girls were wrong. Hopefully everyone involved will learn something from this experience.

As Melon lady informed me, "if she can't handle it she shouldn't be out there". Maybe we all should consider drinking that cup of Kool-Aid. It would certainly seem that both sides need to evaluate our player's ability to "hang" on the pitch.

From earlier feedback, "Real World" lessons would indicate that if an object is in your back you move to the right or to the left. I will be talking with my dd regarding the elbows. Again, the more details your player can provide will improve my ability to call my dd to the carpet regarding what you have indicated. Again, its time for us to learn from these unfortunate moments.

Furthermore, I can PM the player jersey numbers that wished my dd harm as she played in her subsequent game as they walked past me going back to the tent while your other team took the field. I could not tell which of your players were calling me names from under the sportbrella while watching a younger red team championship game later in the afternoon as I picked up garbage from the fields since they called me names then ducked back into the sportbrella. However, there were two young ladies that were quite pleasant when inquiring about our girls score for the last game. Demonstrated excellent manners by saying excuse me, thank you, etc. I even giggled at one of them in how she repeated the score to her teammates... never heard it put that way... very cute!

While I remain challenged in the logic tree for the equality of events, I concede that as mothers we will protect our young and for that I appreciate your feedback. I will have a long discussion with my dd for further clarification.

At the end of the day, the pool winner was an academy team with no subs. Pretty impressive group of girls that I really enjoyed watching play.

We have all been there when a team is behind on the board and the game becomes increasingly physical. Crap happens when mixed with fatigue, heat, & competition then add a touch of emerging hormones.

Not calling anyone out. Not trying to stir any pots here. Not claiming that every action between both players during the course of the game was under microscope.... just evaluating the one moment in which another player was punched. In a forum such as this, I was hoping to gain some veteran advice and a reasonable conversation in regards to an accountability chain.

Collectively as parents, coaches, referees are we saying this kind of conduct is acceptable? If so, how do we establish a sliding scale to weigh the player's inability to regulate their emotions on the field with adequate discipline measures?

This is not a one sided inquiry just on the behalf of my dd but for the other players on her team. I adore them as my own. I seek a logic tree that I can follow to protect these children because if the professionals I entrust these precious athletes to cannot or will not protect them on the field then I need to find a quality solution to insure their safety. That is the bottom line.

stillyuk wrote:Personally, I'd have punched the hysterical screeching woman. That would have been justified.

ralfdallas wrote:Great article: http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/more-family-fun/201202/what-makes-nightmare-sports-parent

I used to be a lot guiltier than I am of late. How about you?

Gunner9 wrote:I don't know what the big deal is about the screeching woman. I heard at least 10 just like her on the sidelines yesterday.

InaB wrote:There is a difference between physicality and brutality.

fourfourtwo wrote:

InaB wrote:There is a difference between physicality and brutality.

When my kid is doing the dishing it's physicality. When she's the one getting popped it's brutality. I sure wish refs would learn to tell the difference.

rollstogether wrote:The content remains the same irregardless of the sequence. Red player deserved being sucker punched because she was elbowing which was not called by the referee which in and of itself means nothing since many calls can be missed. Honestly, I can tell you that I only heard comments from the person in a melon colored shirt because she was continuously informing me that dd deserved the punch, no elbows or pushing is part of soccer and if her back was injured she shouldn't be on the field. My response to this was she was cleared for soccer play but not for boxing. Any other interactions I cannot account for because I made the decision that a representative from the tournament needed to be present because you are right the sideline was intense. In an effort, to prevent any physical altercations, this measure was implemented. Sounds like that was at least one good idea. If you wish to share with me any regulations that approve this type of soccer play, please I am open to all opportunities for learning.

RosiePalms wrote:

rollstogether wrote:The content remains the same irregardless of the sequence. Red player deserved being sucker punched because she was elbowing which was not called by the referee which in and of itself means nothing since many calls can be missed. Honestly, I can tell you that I only heard comments from the person in a melon colored shirt because she was continuously informing me that dd deserved the punch, no elbows or pushing is part of soccer and if her back was injured she shouldn't be on the field. My response to this was she was cleared for soccer play but not for boxing. Any other interactions I cannot account for because I made the decision that a representative from the tournament needed to be present because you are right the sideline was intense. In an effort, to prevent any physical altercations, this measure was implemented. Sounds like that was at least one good idea. If you wish to share with me any regulations that approve this type of soccer play, please I am open to all opportunities for learning.

Trying so hard to sound intelligent and you whip out irregardless making those of us with an education giggle.

The prefix ir- (i-r) is a negative prefix, so if you add the prefix ir to a word that's already negative like regardless, you're making a double-negative word that literally means “without without regard.”

Sooner than later wrote: