When to start looking

So when you're under contract, when and how do you go about shopping for a new team for next year? I know you can't officially look (attend practices, guest play, etc...) without a release until June, right? Is that really enough time? Is there significant movement each year to create open spots on LH teams (any division)? I'm guessing once you ask for that release, your coach will start looking to replace your dd, and I would hate to be stuck with no team after the dust settles. I'm hoping to get advice on the timing of it all. We're new to Dallas, and we didn't make a smart choice. DD doesn't want to leave mid-season or anything, but she may want to look around for next year.

A practice release can be obtained through a simple e-mail from the coach you are under contract with. Coaches tend to be more willing to sign a practice release after state cup.

crazysoccerdad wrote:I know you can't officially look (attend practices, guest play, etc...) without a release until June, right?

Not exactly. Even in June a release is required for guest play.

crazysoccerdad wrote:
Is that really enough time?

It can be. But EVERYONE is looking then. Best to start earlier.

crazysoccerdad wrote:
Is there significant movement each year to create open spots on LH teams (any division)?

Sometimes. Depends on the team.

crazysoccerdad wrote:
I'm guessing once you ask for that release, your coach will start looking to replace your dd

Some coaches handle this better than others. In the end you have to figure out how your kids coach is going to react. Can you be honest with the coach - "we are going to look around" or not? Some coaches will cut you loose right there. That's often the team you are better off without.

Good Luck!

texflats wrote:

crazysoccerdad wrote:I know you can't officially look (attend practices, guest play, etc...) without a release until June, right?

Not exactly. Even in June a release is required for guest play.

crazysoccerdad wrote:
Is that really enough time?

It can be. But EVERYONE is looking then. Best to start earlier.

crazysoccerdad wrote:
Is there significant movement each year to create open spots on LH teams (any division)?

Sometimes. Depends on the team.

crazysoccerdad wrote:
I'm guessing once you ask for that release, your coach will start looking to replace your dd

Some coaches handle this better than others. In the end you have to figure out how your kids coach is going to react. Can you be honest with the coach - "we are going to look around" or not? Some coaches will cut you loose right there. That's often the team you are better off without.

Good Luck!

You can also look for a weekend you current team is not playing and has not conflicts and ask the coach if you DD can guest play in another tournament.... they will see your commitment and this will politely let them know you want thing to improve for your DD... it takes a pretty big effort, but you only have these few years for her to enjoy so focus on making sure any change will be a great fit for your family and your DD's fun factor. Winning is nice for sure, but all the other intangeables are priceless.

Hook It wrote:
You can also look for a weekend you current team is not playing and has not conflicts and ask the coach if you DD can guest play in another tournament.... they will see your commitment and this will politely let them know you want thing to improve for your DD.

Some coaches will see it this way. If you have a coach who appreciates and supports the kids then you should really evaluate whether you need to leave this team!

Other coaches will react badly. They will take the request as a personal affront to their mighty kingdom and their very being. In this case you may need to get the hell outta there anyway.

texflats wrote:

Hook It wrote:
You can also look for a weekend you current team is not playing and has not conflicts and ask the coach if you DD can guest play in another tournament.... they will see your commitment and this will politely let them know you want thing to improve for your DD.

Some coaches will see it this way. If you have a coach who appreciates and supports the kids then you should really evaluate whether you need to leave this team!

Other coaches will react badly. They will take the request as a personal affront to their mighty kingdom and their very being. In this case you may need to get the hell outta there anyway.

I agree completely, and if your situation is like the second case - - RUN, RUN FAST! Life is way to short, do not sweat the spring season, be respectful, but really try and find the best fit for your DD and family. Find some common ground with school, church, etc... the girls will develop friendships if they can get together outside of soccer and it will all work out.

Thanks, guys. Our unhappiness really isn't about winning or loosing. It's about this coach making soccer not fun for my kid anymore. The team itself is a good fit for my dd, and it won't be any easy choice. I think enough parents are feeling this way that it's possible the team will fall apart anyway. Maybe we should look at a D3 team. I would rather she move down a level than get burned out. I really don't like watching softball as much, which is her second choice. Oh wait, it's not about me. Nevermind.

crazysoccerdad wrote:Thanks, guys. Our unhappiness really isn't about winning or loosing. It's about this coach making soccer not fun for my kid anymore. The team itself is a good fit for my dd, and it won't be any easy choice. I think enough parents are feeling this way that it's possible the team will fall apart anyway. Maybe we should look at a D3 team. I would rather she move down a level than get burned out. I really don't like watching softball as much, which is her second choice. Oh wait, it's not about me. Nevermind.

Girls softball.... don't let it happen!

"It's about this coach making soccer not fun for my kid anymore."


leave immediately, there is no stronger reason to leave than this. if you don't then , you will probably get this " dad/mom, i just don't want to play soccer anymore". paying someone to ruin a sport for your kid is the height of foolishness....

I will give the best advice I ever got in soccer

It's his/her soccer, if its not going to hurt them let them do what they want. -Bobby Rhine

There is nothing you can do to keep them from "burning out". Not all kids will play soccer all thru highschool and their is nothing wrong with the sport, the team, the coach, or the kid if they decide their interest isn't enough. If it's not fun anymore for her then she needs to understand why. Too competative, play time, maybe feels she isn't keeping up? Then solve the problem. If you just move her away from her friends and the good fit she may quit anyway because she no longer has her friends. Find out what she wants from soccer and then help guide her but keep in mind that it is her soccer and her choice

Leave on or before April 1st, even of it means she misses the last league game or 3, because after that date your coach may refuse to sign a practice release and there will be nothing you can do about it. In the meantime, make a list of the teams you think are her likely destination 'targets' because they are geographically do-able for your family and they play at the level you think right for your dd. (If D3 is your target division, be sure to include both struggling D2 teams and strongly performing PPL/APL teams that are geographic 'fits', too). Then, check out their league schedules this Spring and pay attention to the way: the team plays ball; the coach talks to the girls; the coach plays his/her bench; and, the parent behave on the sideline. IMO the truest info re teams will be on display when the team you are targeting is playing against a (based on standings, at least) well-matched opponent in a game that they have a realistic hope of winning, but only if they are on their game.

It's a time investment to watch all your target teams play -- do it anyway. That way, you won't waste precious time when you can start looking.

April 1st is the deadline for NTX to sign player releases!

crazysoccerdad wrote:Thanks, guys. Our unhappiness really isn't about winning or loosing. It's about this coach making soccer not fun for my kid anymore. The team itself is a good fit for my dd, and it won't be any easy choice. I think enough parents are feeling this way that it's possible the team will fall apart anyway. Maybe we should look at a D3 team. I would rather she move down a level than get burned out. I really don't like watching softball as much, which is her second choice. Oh wait, it's not about me. Nevermind.

Have a parent only meeting to get feedback and see if a majority share the same concerns if so, discuss with coach to see if coach will address issue (coach might be burned out him/herself),discuss with Director of Coaching of Club, to see if you can keep the team together and get a new coach. It will not be easy, and will take courage to discuss this sensitive subject, but teams who do (parents) seem to weather thru conflict and stay together. It seems like there have been times where people found out after the fact that if they had discussed their concerns amongst each other they might have saved a situation or come out better on the other end.

it ain't easy, but if people can communicate unemotionally upfront, maybe the situation will get resolved.

Hey, I'm a Glass Half Full guy.

Ralfdallas summed it up perfectly. If you know you are leaving just go prior to April 1 and be done with all the coach drama, in the end it would probably leave things in a better place than trying to reason with a little girl's soccer coach anyway. Watching other teams, coaching styles, etc. is great advice as well. You are giving your money, time, and entrusting your daughter to someone for a year, a few weekends on the soccer field to watch games is a small price to invest for her betterment.