Is there something really wrong with NTX soccer

I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

Completely disagree.

The number one problem is the parents, and everything else is a distant 2nd.
Referees are not even in the mix.

MoveYourFeet wrote:Completely disagree.

The number one problem is the parents, and everything else is a distant 2nd.
Referees are not even in the mix.

Agree, and will add there is very little wrong with NTX soccer. The parents and the rankings are the main problem but short of that, all is good.

The US Woman are still the best in the world and US owns women's soccer. We just need to put more NTXns on the team.

MoveYourFeet wrote:Completely disagree.

The number one problem is the parents, and everything else is a distant 2nd.
Referees are not even in the mix.

I think there is a lot that is right with NTX soccer, but if I had to pick the biggest problem I would say that parents are #1.

NTX soccer has enough teams at enough levels that an educated (about soccer and NTX soccer) parent should be able to find the right fit for their daughter.  I think too many parents are pushing their kids to play D1, make ECNL and earn a scholarship when that might be an unrealistic goal.  The girl might not be good enough or might not love soccer enough for such lofty soccer goals.  There is nothing wrong with having a daughter that plays soccer because it is fun and she enjoys the time playing with her teammates.  If your daughter is a stud and she plays and enjoys ECNL - God bless.  If your daughter "just" plays D3 or PP or AP and she enjoys it - God Bless.

I think the real problems occur when parents get their daughter on the "wrong" team.  That leads to all types of frustration and then that one family can become a negative force at practice, on the sidelines, on the forum, etc.  Those are the parents that buy the largest SUV they could find and then complain about the poor gas mileage.

DAMIT... you beat me to it!! Hahaha. Well played sir, well played.

But there is the one who plays up...whose name we shall not speak. Clearly #1. 

I believe that they need to overhaul the system. Until age 14 or so. They should 1) only have kids play for teams based on the region they live in with maybe an a and b team 2) do not have the regions play each other except for 1 time a year (therefore winning at age 8 is not the goal) 3) manditory 1 time a week combined skills training for all teams. The shopping of kids accross teams leads to super teams, rankings, and no need to develope kids when they are young. Obviously this will not happen, but they need to break up the super clubs and move to local teams and then congregate the talent at age 14 for an elite team while the others keep playing. My 2 cents.

Borussia, don't give up. You can still win. Here I'll help
HEADLINE- Borussia takes silver medal as largest factor in NTX Soccer. Gopher finishes third from last. Gopher, your rankings are excellent, it's people overreacting to them that is the problem.

Pale Rider wrote:Borussia, don't give up.  You can still win.  Here I'll help
HEADLINE- Borussia takes silver medal as largest factor in NTX Soccer.  Gopher finishes third from last.         Gopher, your rankings are excellent, it's people overreacting to them that is the problem.  

Completely agree about rankings - they are a useful tool that helps teams decide what level they are at and therefore decide which leagues to play in, which tournaments to enter and with whom they should set up scrimmages.

Rankings don't kill teams.  Parents that overreact to rankings kill teams.

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

The coach was likely right, even though he probably chose the wrong venue to express his opinion. If there is a problem with NTX Soccer (which I think is great BTW), it's with over-zealous parents. Anyone who has been around the fields knows that the parents want to win. It creates pressure for the kids and for coaches who want to develop teams with potential, but often aren't given the time, which is why there is so much player movement. The kids aren't looking to leave a team where they are comfortable with the coaching, like their teammates and enjoy playing the game just because last season's record stunk (for one example), it's the parents. Add to that the price-tag for competitive soccer, and the parents need to see wins becomes even greater. Everyone wants to be a star in their own movie.

thatwasweird wrote:

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

The coach was likely right, even though he probably chose the wrong venue to express his opinion.  If there is a problem with NTX Soccer (which I think is great BTW), it's with over-zealous parents.  Anyone who has been around the fields knows that the parents want to win.  It creates pressure for the kids and for coaches who want to develop teams with potential, but often aren't given the time, which is why there is so much player movement.  The kids aren't looking to leave a team where they are comfortable with the coaching, like their teammates and enjoy playing the game just because last season's record stunk (for one example), it's the parents.  Add to that the price-tag for competitive soccer, and the parents need to see wins becomes even greater.  Everyone wants to be a star in their own movie.

I totally agree.  I have seen far too many 'Nightmare Parents' who 'justify their actions' on how their treat their kids and expect their kids to treat others while playing sports.  Here is an interesting article on what it takes to be a Nightmare Sports Parent - the sad reality is that those parents who are the worst 'nightmare parents' are convinced they are the best parents out there, so are unlikely to change:

http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/more-family-fun/201202/what-makes-nightmare-sports-parent

bwgophers wrote:

Is this 04 only?

If you are talking overall, there can be no rankings discussion without including Yuk and Unc.

I dont understand what rank graph is about?

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

Coaches who yell at the top of their lungs at parents across the field are near the top of the list of things that are wrong.  If a coach has a problem with the way someone is acting there are several avenues available to address this.  Yelling at opposing parents is not one of them.  If my daughter's coach addressed anyone this way, we would be immediately looking for a new team.  I certainly hope his players act with more class than this coach, but unfortunately I have seen too many classless players that are a direct reflection of classless coaches.

Eddie Haskell wrote:

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

Coaches who yell at the top of their lungs at parents across the field are near the top of the list of things that are wrong.  If a coach has a problem with the way someone is acting there are several avenues available to address this.  Yelling at opposing parents is not one of them.  If my daughter's coach addressed anyone this way, we would be immediately looking for a new team.  I certainly hope his players act with more class than this coach, but unfortunately I have seen too many classless players that are a direct reflection of classless coaches.

And I suspect that there are a lot of coaches, where if the parents were so out of control that he had to yell across the field to get them to settle down, would be looking for some new parents.

An out of control sideline almost always has a negative impact on the team, sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly.

ballhead wrote:

Eddie Haskell wrote:

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

Coaches who yell at the top of their lungs at parents across the field are near the top of the list of things that are wrong.  If a coach has a problem with the way someone is acting there are several avenues available to address this.  Yelling at opposing parents is not one of them.  If my daughter's coach addressed anyone this way, we would be immediately looking for a new team.  I certainly hope his players act with more class than this coach, but unfortunately I have seen too many classless players that are a direct reflection of classless coaches.

And I suspect that there are a lot of coaches, where if the parents were so out of control that he had to yell across the field to get them to settle down, would be looking for some new parents.

An out of control sideline almost always has a negative impact on the team, sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly.

The original post mentioned a coach yelling at the OPPOSING parents.  Regardless of the behavior, it is never OK to yell across the field at the opposing parents.  If a coach feels a need to yell across the field at his own parents, he has already lost that battle.

Maybe he was asking some questions, like.....

Eddie Haskell wrote:

ballhead wrote:

Eddie Haskell wrote:

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

Coaches who yell at the top of their lungs at parents across the field are near the top of the list of things that are wrong.  If a coach has a problem with the way someone is acting there are several avenues available to address this.  Yelling at opposing parents is not one of them.  If my daughter's coach addressed anyone this way, we would be immediately looking for a new team.  I certainly hope his players act with more class than this coach, but unfortunately I have seen too many classless players that are a direct reflection of classless coaches.

And I suspect that there are a lot of coaches, where if the parents were so out of control that he had to yell across the field to get them to settle down, would be looking for some new parents.

An out of control sideline almost always has a negative impact on the team, sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly.

The original post mentioned a coach yelling at the OPPOSING parents.  Regardless of the behavior, it is never OK to yell across the field at the opposing parents.  If a coach feels a need to yell across the field at his own parents, he has already lost that battle.

I have seen on multiple occasions, where a sideline has gotten out of control and the ref has warned the coach that if it doesn't stop he's going to get tossed.  

It didn't bother me at all for the coach to holler across the field to "knock it off" as the most expedient way of getting it settled down before he's shown the exit.

That said, I would agree with you about yelling at the opposing parents. It's a waste of time, and won't result in any satisfaction, except for perhaps those same opposing parents.  I'm sure they were simply sitting there, minding their own business, when the coach attacked them.  

I might also add that I've often seen parents yelling at and baiting opposing teams.  In fact I've seen much more of that than the other way around.

I saw a whole sideline (all the parents from one team) thrown out of a game this summer. The game was very quiet after that.

I'm new to this, but there can be no way the refs make enough money to put up with the wacked out parents and out of control coaches.

Havingfunyet wrote:I believe that they need to overhaul the system.  Until age 14 or so.  They should 1) only have kids play for teams based on the region they live in with maybe an a and b team 2) do not have the regions play each other except for 1 time a year (therefore winning at age 8 is not the goal) 3) manditory 1 time a week combined skills training for all teams.  The shopping of kids accross teams leads to super teams, rankings, and no need to develope kids when they are young.  Obviously this will not happen, but they need to break up the super clubs and move to local teams and then congregate the talent at age 14 for an elite team while the others keep playing.  My 2 cents.  

This system is already in place. It's called rec. And the elite team is called high school. Neither are all that great.

ballhead wrote:

Eddie Haskell wrote:

ballhead wrote:

Eddie Haskell wrote:

FCsoccer1 wrote:I noted a soccer soccer coach yesterday yell at the top of his voice to the opposing parents, "You're what is wrong with soccer!!".  

''''Note I am not saying what teams and name of coaches..''''

My main point is "Is there anyone out there trying to better it"...

I think coaches the main problem, refereeing is second problem,,, and us parents are a problem last..... .  

Coaches who yell at the top of their lungs at parents across the field are near the top of the list of things that are wrong.  If a coach has a problem with the way someone is acting there are several avenues available to address this.  Yelling at opposing parents is not one of them.  If my daughter's coach addressed anyone this way, we would be immediately looking for a new team.  I certainly hope his players act with more class than this coach, but unfortunately I have seen too many classless players that are a direct reflection of classless coaches.

And I suspect that there are a lot of coaches, where if the parents were so out of control that he had to yell across the field to get them to settle down, would be looking for some new parents.

An out of control sideline almost always has a negative impact on the team, sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly.

The original post mentioned a coach yelling at the OPPOSING parents.  Regardless of the behavior, it is never OK to yell across the field at the opposing parents.  If a coach feels a need to yell across the field at his own parents, he has already lost that battle.

I have seen on multiple occasions, where a sideline has gotten out of control and the ref has warned the coach that if it doesn't stop he's going to get tossed.  

It didn't bother me at all for the coach to holler across the field to "knock it off" as the most expedient way of getting it settled down before he's shown the exit.

That said, I would agree with you about yelling at the opposing parents. It's a waste of time, and won't result in any satisfaction, except for perhaps those same opposing parents.  I'm sure they were simply sitting there, minding their own business, when the coach attacked them.  

I might also add that I've often seen parents yelling at and baiting opposing teams.  In fact I've seen much more of that than the other way around.

My belief is it almost always begins and ends with parents.  Good parents look for quality coaches (both experience & character) to develop their daughters.  There would be few, if any, obnoxious coaches if parents wouldn't put up with this behavior.  The reality is there will always be 'Bobby Knight' style coaches and 'John Wooden' style coaches.  Given that I realize my daughter will probably not make the US National Team, I am more concerned with all of the ancillary benefits of competitive sports - character development, overcoming challenges, team work, leadership, etc.  If more parents approached it this way, I believe the soccer would be every bit as competitive in NTX, but would also be much more enjoyable for the girls, parents, and coaches (not to mention the refs).  The reality is that we live in a world where people have different values, and there are parents who believe their daughter's performance is a direct reflection on them.  Here is an interesting article from Forbes focused on parenting children through sports:

http://www.forbes.com/sites/bobcook/2013/05/29/how-to-become-a-better-sports-parent-stop-caring/

It's called competetive sports - they keep score. Wanna get a participation trophy and not keep score? Then get off this board, because you probably won't like most of the comments here anyway. Parents are competitive too - every parent I know roots for the team THEIR kid is on...wow! And I have never heard them say that the ref called too many calls in their team's favor...ever. It's been like that forever...you think a feel-good speech about "everybody is a winner" is gonna change a parent's enthusiasm to see their child succeed at the expense of others? good luck with that. Unless of course, you are stating that people should only feel emotion and think the thoughts as you and the thought police deem appropriate...ummm...yeah.

NTX referees - the thinnest skinned, ego-fragile bunch I have ever seen. Combine that with some bad calls, and an inability to control the game, and everything goes downhill. I've been around quite a while, and I can tell you that I have never seen a parent thrown out (and rarely needed to be) during a well-run match by the referee. Only the bad ones seem to have the problems with the parents...why is that? The good ones get an occaisional "c'mon" or whatever, but it never seems to go beyond that for some reason...hmmm...The bad ones also listen more to what the parents sideline is saying more than paying attention to the game. They love the rush of power they get when they say "one more word and you are out-of-here!"...and the person HAS to shut up or not get to see little johnny play.

Academy is the devil - yeah, I said it. I didn't like it when they proposed it, and I still don't. For an athlete to achieve greatness in a sport, they must first love to play the "innocent" game. With the stupid academies starting to cut players, promote and demote players between the 27 teams they have, and charging stupid money for what? So your kid can get enormous amounts of pressure to perform in a game that they hardly know, and only want to experience the joy of playing an organized sport with their friends...(those friends are their schoolmates by the way - not collections of superstars whose parents drive them 2 hours round-trip to practice). Academies only hurt the player by making the game to competitive too early, and introduces them to team/parent/player politics at a very young age - they never truly learn to love the sport. All they seem to learn that fame and success trumps loyalty and true friendship, and you must always make sure to outshine your teammates/friends/co-workers or you will never get ahead in life.

10sDad wrote:It's called competetive sports - they keep score.  Wanna get a participation trophy and not keep score?  Then get off this board, because you probably won't like most of the comments here anyway.  Parents are competitive too - every parent I know roots for the team THEIR kid is on...wow!  And I have never heard them say that the ref called too many calls in their team's favor...ever.  It's been like that forever...you think a feel-good speech about "everybody is a winner" is gonna change a parent's enthusiasm to see their child succeed at the expense of others?  good luck with that.  Unless of course, you are stating that people should only feel emotion and think the thoughts as you and the thought police deem appropriate...ummm...yeah.

NTX referees - the thinnest skinned, ego-fragile bunch I have ever seen.  Combine that with some bad calls, and an inability to control the game, and everything goes downhill.  I've been around quite a while, and I can tell you that I have never seen a parent thrown out (and rarely needed to be) during a well-run match by the referee.  Only the bad ones seem to have the problems with the parents...why is that?  The good ones get an occaisional "c'mon" or whatever, but it never seems to go beyond that for some reason...hmmm...The bad ones also listen more to what the parents sideline is saying more than paying attention to the game.  They love the rush of power they get when they say "one more word and you are out-of-here!"...and the person HAS to shut up or not get to see little johnny play.

Academy is the devil - yeah, I said it.  I didn't like it when they proposed it, and I still don't.  For an athlete to achieve greatness in a sport, they must first love to play the "innocent" game.  With the stupid academies starting to cut players, promote and demote players between the 27 teams they have, and charging stupid money for what?  So your kid can get enormous amounts of pressure to perform in a game that they hardly know, and only want to experience the joy of playing an organized sport with their friends...(those friends are their schoolmates by the way - not collections of superstars whose parents drive them 2 hours round-trip to practice).  Academies only hurt the player by making the game to competitive too early, and introduces them to team/parent/player politics at a very young age - they never truly learn to love the sport.  All they seem to learn that fame and success trumps loyalty and true friendship, and you must always make sure to outshine your teammates/friends/co-workers or you will never get ahead in life.  

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner!

AMEN Brother 10s. Don't stop! you on a ROLL! Tellin 'em like it was, is, and will be! Taken this joint to the bank you are and you is!