Have a seat...but not right there

by loveofthegame 08/09/14, 05:05 pm

Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

by TNT 08/09/14, 05:12 pm

I follow my daughter to whatever end of the field she is on, however I get along with all parents no matter what team as I figure we are all out to support our kids.

by Guest 08/09/14, 05:15 pm

Just laugh it off. It shows either their lack of knowledge of the ettiquete of the game... Or well, some people just cant be helped...

by MustangGT 08/09/14, 05:16 pm

If you can keep your big mouth shut feel free to sit where you want. If you cannot, do not cry about the consequences when someone gets tired of hearing your worthless banter.

by Guest 08/09/14, 06:09 pm

This is a job for the sideline police. Alas....if only deuce's daddy were still around...ahem.

by Lefty 08/09/14, 06:09 pm

loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

I'm confused. Why not just sit on the end of the field where your dd's team is assigned?

Who cares where they are warming up.

by Coach&Ref 08/09/14, 07:03 pm

MustangGT wrote:If you can keep your big mouth shut feel free to sit where you want. If you cannot, do not cry about the consequences when someone gets tired of hearing your worthless banter.

What he said! Very Happy

by Its Me 08/09/14, 08:27 pm

loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

Really? Life is too simple to get upset because someone sits on your side of the mid field line. Yes, it happens. It's not the first and it's not the last time that it will happen.

What do you do when you buy a ticket to a professional sporting event and find out that someone in front of you is wearing the opposing team jersey? Look at it like that. Enjoy the game and if they want to coach their kid let them have at it.

by upper95 08/09/14, 10:17 pm

Its Me wrote:

What do you do when you buy a ticket to a professional sporting event and find out that someone in front of you is wearing the opposing team jersey?

Hope that the drunk NY Giants fan doesn't spill his beer on you and yell "I wanna be somebody" all game.
Can pretty much tolerate anything up to that.

Seriously, though, if you choose to park amongst the opposing fans along the touchline, use common sense and don't yell "elbow him in the face" to one of your players. A team manager was complaining about just that at a boys game at Richland last weekend.

by db10 09/09/14, 07:47 am

Question: why pay a coach / club $3000 a year if you feel that you have to follow little Suzy around the field and coach her from the sidelines? Or better, the GK parents who feel the must switch ends of the field along with their daughter... Rolling Eyes

by Its Me 09/09/14, 08:16 am

db10 wrote:Question: why pay a coach / club $3000 a year if you feel that you have to follow little Suzy around the field and coach her from the sidelines? Or better, the GK parents who feel the must switch ends of the field along with their daughter...

Excellent question. However, these are those Joystick parents that try to control everything their kid does on the field. They don't realize how stupid they look following the kid from end to end. They would also follow the kids around the field if the coach would let them on the players side.

by Coach&Ref 09/09/14, 08:37 am

Its Me wrote:
db10 wrote:Question: why pay a coach / club $3000 a year if you feel that you have to follow little Suzy around the field and coach her from the sidelines? Or better, the GK parents who feel the must switch ends of the field along with their daughter...
Excellent question. However, these are those Joystick parents that try to control everything their kid does on the field. They don't realize how stupid they look following the kid from end to end. They would also follow the kids around the field if the coach would let them on the players side.

I need to change my signature to include "parents." Good call, It's Me! Very Happy

by db10 09/09/14, 08:43 am

Do they not realize the pressure of the game, coach's expectations, and other players is probably enough? I sat behind my daughter's goal once because there were a few nice shade trees. Then I noticed she realized I was back there in warm ups and was looking back at me for approval. Took me about 2 seconds to realize this was not a good thing so I moved away to the sideline.

by CoachKyle101 09/09/14, 08:46 am

loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

A couple of questions for you here:

1. What is your purpose of having your daughter in club soccer?

Is it so that she is on a winning team and is winning week in and week out? Is it so that she gets better at something she loves and has fun at the same time? By fighting or thinking there is a "side" to sit on on the sideline, you've already sent the message that this is not a game, but rather life or death and you must win at all costs. You've sent the message that it is us against them, and that this is not a friendly competition.

The purpose of playing the other team is take what you've learned in practice and apply it in live action. Is it nice to win? Sure. Should you try to win? Yes, but it should not be the only goal.

2. Why does it matter if parents from the other team come sit by you or stand by you?

Have a good time, socialize and watch the game with a fellow dad. It will make your experience so much better in regards to the whole club thing, and who knows you may find a fellow Manchester United fan to go down to the local pub and watch games on Saturday morning with.

I will tell you this, in college some of the best times before an American Football game was spent in the parking lot with the other team's fans. It's great to get to know other people and possibly experience a "different" culture.

by Guest 09/09/14, 08:49 am

CoachKyle101 wrote:
loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

A couple of questions for you here:

1. What is your purpose of having your daughter in club soccer?

Is it so that she is on a winning team and is winning week in and week out? Is it so that she gets better at something she loves and has fun at the same time? By fighting or thinking there is a "side" to sit on on the sideline, you've already sent the message that this is not a game, but rather life or death and you must win at all costs. You've sent the message that it is us against them, and that this is not a friendly competition.

The purpose of playing the other team is take what you've learned in practice and apply it in live action. Is it nice to win? Sure. Should you try to win? Yes, but it should not be the only goal.

2. Why does it matter if parents from the other team come sit by you or stand by you?

Have a good time, socialize and watch the game with a fellow dad. It will make your experience so much better in regards to the whole club thing, and who knows you may find a fellow Manchester United fan to go down to the local pub and watch games on Saturday morning with.

I will tell you this, in college some of the best times before an American Football game was spent in the parking lot with the other team's fans. It's great to get to know other people and possibly experience a "different" culture.

don't coaches have better things to do then argue with parents on a forum?

by Firebird 09/09/14, 08:53 am

Reply: since I pay a coach / club $3000, we GK parents can switch ends of the field along with our daughter to get a front row seat and enjoy the game...

by SolarPower00 09/09/14, 08:53 am

Coach&Ref wrote:
Its Me wrote:
db10 wrote:Question: why pay a coach / club $3000 a year if you feel that you have to follow little Suzy around the field and coach her from the sidelines? Or better, the GK parents who feel the must switch ends of the field along with their daughter...
Excellent question. However, these are those Joystick parents that try to control everything their kid does on the field. They don't realize how stupid they look following the kid from end to end. They would also follow the kids around the field if the coach would let them on the players side.

I need to change my signature to include "parents." Good call, It's Me!

Have a seat...but not right there Pot-an10

by SD69 09/09/14, 08:55 am

CoachKyle101 wrote:
A couple of questions for you here:

1. What is your purpose of having your daughter in club soccer?

Is it so that she is on a winning team and is winning week in and week out? Is it so that she gets better at something she loves and has fun at the same time? By fighting or thinking there is a "side" to sit on on the sideline, you've already sent the message that this is not a game, but rather life or death and you must win at all costs. You've sent the message that it is us against them, and that this is not a friendly competition.

The purpose of playing the other team is take what you've learned in practice and apply it in live action. Is it nice to win? Sure. Should you try to win? Yes, but it should not be the only goal.

2. Why does it matter if parents from the other team come sit by you or stand by you?

Have a good time, socialize and watch the game with a fellow dad. It will make your experience so much better in regards to the whole club thing, and who knows you may find a fellow Manchester United fan to go down to the local pub and watch games on Saturday morning with.

I will tell you this, in college some of the best times before an American Football game was spent in the parking lot with the other team's fans. It's great to get to know other people and possibly experience a "different" culture.

by db10 09/09/14, 09:36 am

CoachKyle101 wrote:
loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

A couple of questions for you here:

1. What is your purpose of having your daughter in club soccer?

Is it so that she is on a winning team and is winning week in and week out? Is it so that she gets better at something she loves and has fun at the same time? By fighting or thinking there is a "side" to sit on on the sideline, you've already sent the message that this is not a game, but rather life or death and you must win at all costs. You've sent the message that it is us against them, and that this is not a friendly competition.

The purpose of playing the other team is take what you've learned in practice and apply it in live action. Is it nice to win? Sure. Should you try to win? Yes, but it should not be the only goal.

2. Why does it matter if parents from the other team come sit by you or stand by you?

Have a good time, socialize and watch the game with a fellow dad. It will make your experience so much better in regards to the whole club thing, and who knows you may find a fellow Manchester United fan to go down to the local pub and watch games on Saturday morning with.

I will tell you this, in college some of the best times before an American Football game was spent in the parking lot with the other team's fans. It's great to get to know other people and possibly experience a "different" culture.

Why does it matter? It shouldn't, but how long do you think it takes people to get pissed off at the parent yelling "dont let her push you! push her back!" or "put her down!" before it gets nasty out there? Let's face it a few yards between groups is probably a good thing. Just Google soccer parents fighting...

by Guest 09/09/14, 09:55 am

Why do goalies parents move from end to end? Are they going to help their daughter make that big save? Why not sit with everyone else.

by Guest 09/09/14, 09:59 am

Unicorns wrote:Why do goalies parents move from end to end? Are they going to help their daughter make that big save? Why not sit with everyone else.

Unless you are the parent of a goalkeeper, you wouldn't understand. I can tell that by your comment.

by Guest 09/09/14, 10:01 am

You are right, help explain it. Why be right next to them, within eyesight of them when they look to sidelines and they know exactly where you are.

Do you think that helps them? Honest question.

by loveofthegame 09/09/14, 10:05 am

CoachKyle101 wrote:
loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

A couple of questions for you here:

1. What is your purpose of having your daughter in club soccer?

Is it so that she is on a winning team and is winning week in and week out? Is it so that she gets better at something she loves and has fun at the same time? By fighting or thinking there is a "side" to sit on on the sideline, you've already sent the message that this is not a game, but rather life or death and you must win at all costs. You've sent the message that it is us against them, and that this is not a friendly competition.

The purpose of playing the other team is take what you've learned in practice and apply it in live action. Is it nice to win? Sure. Should you try to win? Yes, but it should not be the only goal.

2. Why does it matter if parents from the other team come sit by you or stand by you?

Have a good time, socialize and watch the game with a fellow dad. It will make your experience so much better in regards to the whole club thing, and who knows you may find a fellow Manchester United fan to go down to the local pub and watch games on Saturday morning with.

I will tell you this, in college some of the best times before an American Football game was spent in the parking lot with the other team's fans. It's great to get to know other people and possibly experience a "different" culture.

I'm going to assume by your handle you are, in fact, a coach. Let's be perfectly honest. It feels better to win, there I said it. Let me address each of your questions in kind if I may.

1) Why do I have my daughter in club soccer? Multi-level response here: A) she loves the game and she loves her team. Is she the biggest, fastest, most skilled player on the field? No. Does she contribute to her team with the skills she does have? Yes. We have her in club soccer because competition is a part of everyday life. If in fact, we were all out there to enjoy a snowcone after the game, then we could go back to rec. B) But let's not just pin this on the parents here. Coaches at the club level push just as hard to win. Some more than others. I will say that our coach communicates to us, the parents, and the girls, before and after each game on what the expectations are going in to the game and how they either achieved, or missed the mark. This is more than I can say for many coaches, whom I have seen simply grab their bag and walk off the field immediately after the game. C) We have our daughter in club soccer so that she can learn to win AND lose with dignity, humility and respect. That being said, we are all human and can overreact to calls or outcomes that we don't feel land in our favor. Life lessons can be learned in victory and defeat. IMHO, those lessons are not being taught in the world of rec where everyone gets a trophy for showing up. We have our daughter in club soccer so she can develop not only her soccer skills, but skills that will carry over into life skills.

2) Why does it matter if other parents sit/stand by me? Well, why not combine the benches on your side coach? As stated before, we are human. Our daughters are human. They develop friendships and rivalries with opposing teams, just as parents do. I'm sure there are opposing coaches you don't want to stand beside, correct? I have stood and watched games with opposing parents, even complimenting and receiving compliments from opposing parents. Shook their hand and told their daughter she played well. These are the the times I DON'T say anything. It's when the opposing parents set a tone that we were on THEIR side, but then proceed to infringe on the very breach of etiquette they chose to call out that I have a problem with. What's good for the goose, as they say.

by Guest 09/09/14, 10:19 am

Unicorns wrote:You are right, help explain it. Why be right next to them, within eyesight of them when they look to sidelines and they know exactly where you are.

Do you think that helps them? Honest question.

Sure, I will be happy to explain. Now I am speaking only for myself and my DD. Other gk parents can chime in. First of all I conduct myself like I have half a brain so there is never a problem. I do it because my DD likes to see me closer to her when she is at the opposite end. I guess it's just a visual thing because I rarely say anything very loud. Mostly just give her a thumbs up and a smile. I do not coach her thats not my job. Like I said act like you got some common sense and all of this is a moot point. Most importantly she is a10 year little girl playing a rough sport and she is my little girl.

by soccerjack 09/09/14, 10:33 am

silentparent wrote:
CoachKyle101 wrote:
loveofthegame wrote:Ok all, I read on the forums, try not to get sucked into debates/arguments but wanted to get feedback on something that I am starting to see trend. Follow me if you will:

Plano Labor Day tournament and our team was warming up at the North end of the field while the game before us finished up. As the game ended, our merry band of travelers with chairs, pop up tents, etc walk to the North end of the sidelines to set up camp. Meanwhile, our opponent, who was warming up on the South end mind you, makes a beeline across the field and straight for the bench on the North end. Now here come the opposing parents weaving their way inbetween all of our parents and setting up, then COMPLAINING that we were on THEIR sideline. After a few muffled comments (on both sides mind you, nobody's perfect here), we pack up all of our stuff and go to the other side. But that's not where it stops! A few of the dads from the opposing team walk down and stand on OUR side to coach (read yell at) their kids. Where and when do you draw the line? Debate begins......NOW!

A couple of questions for you here:

1. What is your purpose of having your daughter in club soccer?

Is it so that she is on a winning team and is winning week in and week out? Is it so that she gets better at something she loves and has fun at the same time? By fighting or thinking there is a "side" to sit on on the sideline, you've already sent the message that this is not a game, but rather life or death and you must win at all costs. You've sent the message that it is us against them, and that this is not a friendly competition.

The purpose of playing the other team is take what you've learned in practice and apply it in live action. Is it nice to win? Sure. Should you try to win? Yes, but it should not be the only goal.

2. Why does it matter if parents from the other team come sit by you or stand by you?

Have a good time, socialize and watch the game with a fellow dad. It will make your experience so much better in regards to the whole club thing, and who knows you may find a fellow Manchester United fan to go down to the local pub and watch games on Saturday morning with.

I will tell you this, in college some of the best times before an American Football game was spent in the parking lot with the other team's fans. It's great to get to know other people and possibly experience a "different" culture.

don't coaches have better things to do then argue with parents on a forum?

That's classic. Doesn't a "Soccer Coach" have better things to do than be on a "Soccer Board". I would think you might have better things to do than making Dumba$$ statements on every topic every 5 minutes. I try to keep my Dumba$$ statements to once a week.

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Have a seat...but not right there

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