Coaching and Unsportsmanlike behavior... An individual's actions do leave lasting impressions

I don't rant much, but as much as I tried to forget this happened the more it disappointed me to no end.

Situation was this, Sunday at a game (Won't use names as the coach is on this forum and will read this and point will be served) one of our girls went up for a header or something and she landed on her head (didn't look pretty), instantly in tears etc. Our whole team and most of their team takes a knee as is customary and the good sportsman like thing to do, so I thought.

The other teams coach yells, STAND UP "TEAM NAME", "TEAM NAME" doesn't take a knee on the field.

Really?

I have coached youth sports for 12 years, and I have heard and seen some un-sportsman like comments and activities, but this was uncalled for, had my DD been playing for this coaches team it would have been her last game, I promise you, I truly believe youth sports is for teaching the game of life. And this coach’s behavior goes against everything in my being. Now in hind sight, I'm sure he just got caught up in the moment etc, but again, we are talking about a hurt 7-8 yr old girl.

I have 3 rules for my DD when we go to the games: 1. Maximum Effort, 2. Be a Good Sport (Both to your team and the opposing team) and 3. Listen to your coach. So after the game, even my DD asked why that coach was such a bad sport, huh... and we thought they don't pay attention...

So I step down off my high horse and go back to entering scores.

PS - I wish this team the best and for what it's worth, the little girl that fell is no worse for the wear and it's just parents left cleaning up the mess!

Maybe the coach was a real jerk... or maybe taking a knee when someone is injured isn't a universal gesture of concern quite like you think. I see lots of teams that get together and meet during injuries. Sometimes players will run to the sideline for a quick drink. Others will stretch. The offending coach may have wanted his players to stay loose (probably some misconception he picked up on the internet). If he was otherwise being well-mannered during the game, I doubt he meant any extreme disrespect by telling his players to stand up.

Players get injured a lot in soccer. Taking a knee on a rock hard pitch for the entire time a player is being treated is really not the most comfortable position to be in.

I think as the kids get older you see teams taking a knee less and less. Especially during cold weather. Probably was not in the best taste to yell those instructions out when the child was injured. Better to wait until the game was over or talk about it in practice. We have seen several teams do this as well. When I first saw it, it caught me off guard, but I did not think they were being bad sports. But they were also 10 at that point.

I happen to know of the coach he is referring to. Certainly his intentions were not bad or at least you would hope that an academy coach would not teach bad sportsmanship!

He should remember these girls absorb much more than we give them credit for! We expect them to remember soccer moves and tactics, we should also be teaching good sportsmanship.

Yelling "We don't take a knee" while a player is down is uncalled for and ridiculous! Address it after the game if you don't want your team to take a knee. Futhermore don't get offended when you get called out on the forum for not taking a knee during injuries.

I was watching another team scrimmage this weekend and one of the girls hammered the ball it went about five feet and hit an opposing player in the face. No doubt it was painful and the girl was lucky she wasn't hurt really bad. The player that kicked it ran over to check on the girl. That was pretty neat especially coming from a 7-8 y/o.

Agreed I wouldn't yell that as a coach during a game, handle afterwards, but just because you don't take a knee does not indicate bad sportsmanship. Many coaches have their kids run over and grab water and give a little instruction to the group, this seems reasonable and best use of time, then just clap when the boy or girls gets up.

What is the origin of the "take a knee" tradition, and what is the meaning/purpose of it? Does it come from American football? Or is it a European tradition?

google it

See here(from our friendly Google results): http://www.usyouthsoccer.org/blog.asp?post_id=1237

thanks for the research! Here is what Sam Snow said in his blog (in part):

"The action to take knee when a player is injured is not required in the Laws of the Game. However, it has become a bit of a local habit in some youth soccer circles (a spillover from gridiron football). The better procedure would be that if the referee has stopped the match for an injury to have the rest of the players to go to the touchline in front of their team bench, but do not leave the field of play, and get a drink of water. If the coach is not involved with the care of the injured player, then he or she may have a BRIEF word with the players (during this moment in the game the coach must remain in the technical area)..."

to call the players over to the sidelines would have been a better solution. I am not a big fan of the taking a knee thing myself. Also the 8 yr old will learn to finish the play until the ref blows a wistle but for now thats cute

Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

wolf2.0 wrote:Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

You sure you aren't referring to a 99 D3 team/player this year?

KatCon wrote:

wolf2.0 wrote:Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

You sure you aren't referring to a 99 D3 team/player this year?

Nope, but I'm pretty sure I know the team/player you're talking about.

wolf2.0 wrote:Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

Best way to handle this, if serious enough issue, is to talk to the ref BEFORE the game and lay out your concerns for player safety. The ref should pay more attention and will be able to head off issues early in the game. Eventually this player will suffer from tighter standards due to her bad reputation.

Shelby427 wrote:

wolf2.0 wrote:Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

Best way to handle this, if serious enough issue, is to talk to the ref BEFORE the game and lay out your concerns for player safety. The ref should pay more attention and will be able to head off issues early in the game. Eventually this player will suffer from tighter standards due to her bad reputation.

The ref in this particular game was one who told us he was probably going to cut the game to 18 minutes each half because it was the end of the day (it was mid-afternoon) and he wanted to go home.

wolf2.0 wrote:

Shelby427 wrote:

wolf2.0 wrote:Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

Best way to handle this, if serious enough issue, is to talk to the ref BEFORE the game and lay out your concerns for player safety. The ref should pay more attention and will be able to head off issues early in the game. Eventually this player will suffer from tighter standards due to her bad reputation.

The ref in this particular game was one who told us he was probably going to cut the game to 18 minutes each half because it was the end of the day (it was mid-afternoon) and he wanted to go home.

Tell me you are joking….

This is one example when it is nice for the teams to pay the refs directly. This way you could have offered him 75% of his normal fee.

I dont think you know of whom KC speaks wolf

Shelby427 wrote:

wolf2.0 wrote:

Shelby427 wrote:

wolf2.0 wrote:Played a game last season in SDL where a defender on the other team launched herself in the air feet first at knee height 3 times in a row on players dribbling with the ball. It wasn't mistimed, she waited until the ball had been knocked past her then charged towards the player. On the third occasion when it was clear this wasn't an accident but a deliberate attempt to just 'take her out' and I was kneeling by one of our girls on the ground who was crying hysterically, one of their team parents shouted out "yeah baby girl, that's how we do, that's how we do".

When I reached my sideline I turned to the other coach and asked "any chance you ask her to stop deliberately taking girls out, she's going to badly injure somebody or herself?". He just smirked at me and 5 minutes later when he subbed her he gave her a high-five as she came off saying "way to let nobody get past you".

I know that two other teams (from different clubs) in our bracket had the same experience with this team and this one particular player. I don't know why a coach would support it, a parent would encourage it and a child would be guided so badly that she didn't realize it was the wrong thing to do.

Best way to handle this, if serious enough issue, is to talk to the ref BEFORE the game and lay out your concerns for player safety. The ref should pay more attention and will be able to head off issues early in the game. Eventually this player will suffer from tighter standards due to her bad reputation.

The ref in this particular game was one who told us he was probably going to cut the game to 18 minutes each half because it was the end of the day (it was mid-afternoon) and he wanted to go home.

Tell me you are joking….

This is one example when it is nice for the teams to pay the refs directly. This way you could have offered him 75% of his normal fee.

75%? That's a bit generous. He walked the entire game. Barely called a single throw-in (whoever reached the ball first got the throw in), didn't agree with the concept of corners for either team, said subs could be made at any time ("just send them on") and met any question with "it's ok, it doesn't matter, it's just soccer". He only said that about a dozen times across the 4 games he covered for us so I might have misheard him.

I was at the mentioned game and here is my two cents:

3 reasons why this possibly happened:

1. Getting the girls in a habit of playing till the whistle is blown and play is stopped. It has occurred several times where a player goes down and the girls automatically take a knee and do not finish out the play. Basically, starting the process of teaching them not to stop on a play.

2. Keep moving - its a proven fact, even at this age, when you do stop and take a knee...bad things potentially can happen. Staying "stood up" shows no disrespect; but keeps the blood flowing. This was an opportunity to reinforce.

3. A person on the sidelines told the team to take a knee. The coach wanted to reiterate that the players are to listen to him and not a parent yelling on the sideline. We have all seen a coach setting up a play. A mom or a dad can basically whisper what they think is accurate, even though they do not see the whole picture or have not been to practices, and the player will listen to the parent rather than the coach.

If the actions are not for you...easiest and most common sense thing to do is not place your daughter on that team. No posting necessary! Based on watching older kids play in competitive environment in other sports, its really not that big of a deal. If you notice, several of the players asked if the girl was ok after she got up. That means so much more than just taking a knee.

With that said, if a play is severly hurt and its obvious she will need more attention than a coach saying are you ok and get up, then proper respect should and would be displayed.

pull_your_line wrote:I dont think you know of whom KC speaks wolf

PYL, what is sad is this particular player just smiles/giggles after the play and walks away.

pull_your_line wrote:I dont think you know of whom KC speaks wolf

Mine and KCs 99 teams played in the same division for 2 years and we played the same opponents, I'm pretty sure we're thinking of the same person.

wolf2.0 wrote:

pull_your_line wrote:I dont think you know of whom KC speaks wolf

Mine and KCs 99 teams played in the same division for 2 years and we played the same opponents, I'm pretty sure we're thinking of the same person.

Wolfe, I am not sure how long this player has been in D3 because I don't remember them from last year. Maybe she has taken on rugby as a second sport and is just getting confused between the two this year. Whatever the case it is pretty unfortunate situation as many dd's have had to take time off due to injuries.....